Was listening to Any Way You Want It on the way home today, and I was struck with a thought: What the hell is this about?

After much delibertation, I have formulated a theory. The song is a heartwarming tale of a man and the girl he loved, who worked the late shift at the local Burger King. My reasons?

She said 'any way you want it, that's the way you need it'

Which is vaguely reminiscent of the BK slogan of days gone by: "You got it!" Whilst her working practices are given away in the lines

All night, all night etc.

Her enormously extended Hold on must have something to do with waiting for food to be microwaved. The rest is just generic relationship crap.

I'm telling ya, its about shagging in a fast food restaurant. Come on, you believe me, don't you?